June 29, 2009

WHAT'S IN A NAME?




Since I talk with Jordan from Mean Mommy Academy, like—well, practically every day, she has expressed an UTMOST desire for a nickname. She says I have it easy because I can cut my name in half like a polish hot dog and I can go with either. (I choose Cam—the upper portion of that hot dog—because ‘Ryn’ just doesn’t flow for me.)

I thought: “What a tragedy! Not to have a nickname?! She is utterly deprived!” Because she didn’t ask, I thought I would help her out.
*insert evil maniacal laughter here.*

Sit back ladies—this is what I’ve come up with.

CASE STUDY’S NAME: JORDAN


Okay, under the microscope we can start with…Jo. “Jo” is a timelessly OLD name that originated with the……..the aborigines of Arkansas circa 954 B.C.



{Historians, don’t bother looking that up – you won’t find it}
We could also add another “Jo” to the name and we’d get:
“Jo Jo”……..hmmm…….but that brings to mind a certain Disney clown—and heavens, we wouldn’t want to raise any confusion here. So, I thought…….and thought some more……….then I decided to muster all my brain power—a tremendous feat some say—and I inventively came up with: ‘Jodo.’

“MAY THE JODO FORCE BE WITH YOU!!!!!”

*GaSp*
SORRY!! *clamps a stern hand over the mouth, giggling* I just can’t help myself! It just bursts out of me from nowhere! At least—she’d be Jedi worthy.




We could call her “Jedi Jodo”--our voice transforming into a Yoda dialect—as we bow respectfully.

“This a good name, it is,” my inner Yoda tells me. “hmm mmm. Yes, thinks me, Master Jedi Jodo is ready, ready to find her inner name, believe that she is…a true jedi. Ready to accept that Darth Vader--is not her father, but her cousin!”

*All eyes turn to Camryn*

Camryn: “No, No, not me.” She rolls the eyes. “A TOTALLY different cousin. Although, Darth Vader styles a rockin’ bad oxygen mask! I wonder if paramedics can buy those wholesale…?”
Yeah, can you imagine?
“BREATHE!!! MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU!”
*unspecified patient gasps for air*

Okay, maybe Jordan wouldn’t like “Jedi Jodo." Maybe she’s more: Obi-Wan Kenobi Jodo!
[Maybe it’s just me…..but……I’m not seeing Jordan diggin’ that one.]

So, I’m thinking…….thinking harder than a 1 GB iPod to retrieve information…..and how about: ‘Jor’

Hmmm. But if you say it really, REALLY fast, you can almost hear “drawer.”
Maybe “Jord”, but then my eyes play tricks with my mind and I see “Gord” (like Halloween harvest decorations.) And if it was ‘Jord’, I would have the uncanny urge to put a “Y” at the end—and I’m not Trekky. (Nor does Jordan sport old-fashioned silver headbands for sunglasses. If she did, she’d get beat up.)

Then I thought, “why not ‘Jorda’?” You know, like: ‘Jorda Pinkette Smith.’ That’s kind of cute! But, if you go through all that trouble to write her name almost completely out, you may as well put an ‘n’ after it. So, that leaves us with: Jordan

What nicknames can you come up with? We could change the first letter. Borden, Norden, Gorden….heck, why not ‘Yordan’, let’s bring an Israeli sound to it. Or why not: She-Rah?! Remember her obsession with the medieval ninja chick?




Wow, that just opened up a ton of possibilities! Like “She-Jo” or “Jor-She”……and that sounds like Yoshi from Mario Brothers.

Or...... Yoshi Jo-She!
Suddenly, Jordan sounds Asian and I want to order some Kung Pao Chicken and Deep Fried Wontons on the side of my Chinese take-out order.


So what do you think? What should Jordan’s nickname be?
Hmm.....Dorden, Korden.....Xorden.....


9 comments:

sarah said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I can't breathe! Too funny (*sigh*)...
I'm soooo excited to read comments on this one- and what if I do don the occasional silver banana clip over my eyes every now and then, huh? Is it so wrong to love captain John Luke Pachard? So much that I don't know how to spell his last name, and love his team of fearless Treckers of Space?

Okay, you're right, maybe I don't..

But She-Ra on the other hand... even though it's significantly longer, I WILL answer to Princess of Power... ;)

Heather said...

how about ORD? no no...then she will be big fat dragon who eats all the time and would be afraid of even the THOUGHT of dark...hmmm

RDA? no...that's too much like ERDA and that's a small hick town where I live......

Dan? no no.....then she'd need a sex change.

HMMM...how about bug? or bud? or pal? I'm tapped out.

Camryn said...

Wait a sec! What was I thinking? Jordan needs a super awesome name....like Camryn #2

Lol. Actually, if you scramble her name up like eggs, we could get:

Don,ran,Jan,

"RAN JAN!" *snort*

Okay, but my personal fav: DORA!!

Amber Lynae said...

Camryn you could take Dora and make it Jora. That is kinda cute. Or just can her Dan or Dani taking the second half of her name. or just Jodan taking the r out.

Melinda said...

Camryn,
I vote for Jo. It's a strong name ... i.e. Jo from Little Women, Jo from Facts of Life. Nobody messes with a "Jo." ;0)

A nickname should have a little attitude.

My 2 cents.

J said...

I like Jo too. : ) My cousin is Johanna, and goes by Jo. Its cute!


Also, Heather, I am from Erda too!
I knew a Heather, and I am wondering if its you?

Stacy said...

That was HILARIOUS. I like jedi Joda myself - "laugh at you, I will!" What about JOMEANMA, you know Jordan from Mean Mom Academy. I don't know it sounds kind of like a tough "street" name!

Or maybe if you go back to the letter scramble you could go with,
DORJAN - if that doesn't sound like the ruler of a universe I don't know what does.
Or maybe RADJON - never mind I think Jon Gosselin is already using that one!

Anyway, good luck with the name.

Tina said...

Loved the Arkansas picture, it made me laugh out loud.

I too like Joda. I also like the name Stacey suggested of Dorjan...it reminds me of door jam or toe jam....

Heather said...

Jules, WoW! That's awesome! I live in Tooele, I use to work at walmart here but quit to go back to school. I have 4 kids, 1 girl, 3 boys. Does any of this sound familiar?